Hello from the Left Coast

A couple days ago, Mr. Squire and I took an emergency trip out here to visit my ailing grandfather, who suffered a massive stroke last weekend and somehow managed to survive and tell the story.  My dad had bought a one-way ticket, and he had been holding down the fort with his middle brother, with their younger brother not far away.  My brother came for a couple days with his daughter so that my grandpa could meet his only granddaughter for the first time.  The day after they left, we came.  Far-flung family members tend to make special efforts to gather for three major occasions:  birth, marriage, and death.

In the office the day before I left, TV hugged me goodbye and told me she was glad I was taking the time to go (amid two very active cases and one headed to trial) and that it would be a good trip for me to gain some perspective.  Her words rang with truth, and I've been carrying that comment with me ever since.

I'm certain that I'll need more time to process in the days/weeks/months ahead, but here are some of my impressions from the trip so far...

• Faithfulness is measured powerfully by the bad times.  Who walks with you in your times of greatest need?  Who visits you when you no longer have anything to offer in return?  Who remembers you even when you do not remember in return?  Who patiently repeats the same instructions to you, over and over, and over and over, and over and over--and feels heartbreak, rather than outrage, at your inability to comprehend?

• Faithfulness is also measured powerfully by all the other times.  Who celebrates with you in the everyday?  Who prays for you on an email's notice?  Who lights your birthday cake?  Who shares the joy of your good news, and helps shoulder the pain of your bad news?  Who is willing to spontaneously take you in for the night to ease your travel burdens?  Who is still eager to see you even if only once every three years?

• In the end, we will all return to the dust.  There's no escaping it.  And in the end, what will matter?  It is so, so difficult to take the long view at this point in my life.  But failure to take the long view may result in a host of wasted years and effort in the end.