Grumbly Grumbledore

Ahhh, never a dull moment around here.

Mr. Squire finished his school year, took one full day off for break, then started his unpaid internship with our friend Sam on Friday.  He worked the full day on Friday, then on Saturday played an all-day football tournament...should have been six games in all.  Then...I should have known something was up when Harvey called.  Why would Harvey be calling me?  When he said Mr. Squire had gotten hurt, I got really worried--because duhhh, that's why Harvey would call.  Only if it was serious.  :(  

So, an ER visit, an x-ray, and two crutches later, Mr. Squire is housebound and hopping around like a rabbit on his remaining, unsprained foot.  Poor fellow.  But thank God he is in good spirits, because that has made a whole world of difference.  There's only room for one grouch in any given relationship...and I, my friends, was that grouch this weekend. 

It's really sad.  I had worked a pretty full day on Saturday on my pro bono client's work, and then spent a bit of time baking (new pavlova recipe turned out beautifully!), then got ready for dinner with a co-worker.  Then I got the call from Harvey.  I had planned to relax after dinner with the co-worker, snuggle up with a book, catch up on our budget, etc.... but instead, I went to the ER (where Harvey had been taking good care of Mr. Squire), fed the hungry athletes, then had to go out to buy ice packs and more groceries (I saw the mango bars on sale, bought three boxes, and literally prayed aloud in the grocery aisle, "Thank You, God, for loving him this much...to even put the mango bars on sale for him!"), then did all the dishes, helped Mr. Squire get clean, set up everything... I was sweaty and hot and exhausted by the end.  Had I known that Saturday would end that way, I would have planned 8am-7pm a little (read: a lot) differently.

Sunday was no better:  all the things that we usually do together, I had to do by myself... lugging a week's work of groceries the half-mile home and up our fifth-floor walkup is usually no big deal because Mr. Squire is doing it with me--and carrying the majority of the load.  But it was just me.  And then I had to do all the cooking.  And then all the cleaning.  And then the thank-you baking for the kind souls driving us to church.  Then more cleaning.  And it was hot. And I was sweaty.  And I hate being sweaty if I'm not at the gym.

See...all of the above is why I fear being a mom.  I'm too selfish to be a mom!  Over and over this weekend, I had to confess my lack of a servant-like heart.  Just two days of doing everything on my own, and I was Ms. Grumbly Grumbledore.  So terrible!  :(  I was thankful that Mr. Squire was patient amid my grouchiness.  And I saw all the more clearly how much more of a servant-like heart he has than I do.

It's definitely something I need to work on.  So I've been praying a lot for my heart since Saturday.  I need to get better at serving with a joyful heart.  I need more--oh so much more!--of that humility that Jesus had.  Lord, help me!

(And in the meantime, thank You for my merciful husband...)